I'm Still Alive.. and Still Here...

Greeting my few readers. Hey how the hell are you? I have been busy, and un-busy. Leading the charming and somewhat mind boggling-ly slow life of the house mommy.

I have to admit, I have been lazy. With just about everything lazy. You ever have that time in your life where you just want to do nothing? I mean absolutely not a damn thing? Yea that is all me right now. I pretty much float through the day, taking care of Dylan and just basically vegging.

Around two weeks ago, both the little man and I had the stomach flu. I was up for 24 hours having nasty crap come out of both ends. Joygasm, lemme tell you. I still haven't been able to touch red meat. The last meal I had before praying ferverantly to the porcaline goddes was a big ol juicy honking steak. So yea, I am avoiding beef like the plaugue. I have been eating Malt-o-meal and oatmeal pretty much non-stop since.

Good news out of this though, I am down to 180 lbs! When we moved here I was 205, no lie, so since August, I have lost 25 lbs. OF course I have no idea where I am losing it from. I still look the same. My britches are a little more baggy, and I think that is about it.

OK so what else... oh yea Yaz. I am on the birth control product called Yaz. I guess it works, of course you have to be having sex to get pregnant, and I wouldn't know about any of that shit at the moment. The pill is also supposed to make your periods shorter and less painful. Ok, I have been on it for a month and a half, and in this time I have had an excruciating week long period, not the cute little 4 day one the package promises. It also hurt like hell.

It is also supposed to help clear your skin... HAhaha HAHAHAHAAaaaaa. *insert Joker-esk laugh here* OK so it is making my pores smaller. This is good. But as a chic who has had a problem with bacterial cystic acne for much of her life, it isn't working too well. The pores are smaller as I said, but the crap that is trapped usually in my Gi-NORMOUS pores are now being squeezed into itty bitty pores. Thus making me break out. My face is the Sierra Nevada's and my back the Rocky Mountains.

OK I know you all didn't want to read about me complaining about my health like a Jewish Yenta, so this is the good stuff. Dylan has become a little leech. WHile this may sound back, it isn't. Autistic young-uns usually won't notice anyone outside of their little world, and Dylan has finally got the seperation anxiety that most 8 month olds go through.

I am so damned happy about this, he demands, in his own little way, kisses and hugs and cuddles, and best of all he gives them back. Sometimes out of no where, he will walk up to me and hug my leg. This makes me so positive about how far into the Autistic spectrum he really is. Maybe his prognosis isn't as bad as we origionally thought. YEAY!

Oh, oh oh, I forgot, I have already put up christmas decorations. Yea I know I am a putz, but dammit, I am doing this season right this time around. I don't get my tree until today, but the house smells of Evergreen Glade candles and there are ornaments and stockings hung with care over the fireplace. The Man's father died when he was 11, 3 days before christmas. So he never has gotten into the spirit. But dammit if this year if I haven't heard him singing Christmas carols to Dylan. Yeay again!

For presents this year, I am making everyone homemade christmas ornaments. They are so easy, and acutally pretty cheap to make. I love being artistic and this is a great outlet.

My parents are coming to our house this year for Thanksgiving. I am thrilled! Although I am nervous as hell about having them here, and that I have to cook them The Turkey Dinner and all the trimmings, I know it will turn out right. Last year, I made the boys and I dinner and everything went perfectly, well except the stuffing, which turned out like a savory bread pudding. It was ewww. Very ewww. This year and last year are the first ever years that I have not been at my parents house for Thanksgiving. Last year it was so odd. My parents went to my Gandmothers house in Palm Spring, California. They had a miserable time. So this year, I am doing it right dammit.

Back to my laziness I wrote about earlier in the post. Yea, I totally need to get up off my ass and do somemore around the house. Every day I clean the kitchen and take care of Dylan, but.... that's about it. The place gets a little messy and I HATE HATE HATE doing laundry. It has been to cold for me to do lawn work, and the grass isn't growing anyway, so I don't have my excuse of doing outside work instead of inside work.

I hate using the excuse of having a special needs son, and that doesn't allow me time to do things around the house, but it is a lie. I have plenty of time. Dylan is so patient and willing to just be around me, that I could totally clean house every day if I wanted to. The problem is, that I don't get off my lazy ass to do it.

Oh yea, I also look like a bag lady half the time. No make-up, hair in a midget ponytail, and sweats and a t-shirt. I am da sexy bitch, what what? Yea right, like I said I look like a bag lady. It urks the shit out of me that I don't seem to give a damn, it is almost as if there are two of me. The doer and the non-doer. The doer looks down on the non-doer, but the lazy fanny non-doer seems to win.

Whenever The Man comes home from work and I have done my house-wifely duty, i.e. clean stuff other than the kitchen. He jokes and says," Who are you and what did you do with Jessica?" Oh yea, this bothers the crap out of me. He also puts in little jibs about how messy the place is. I want to tell him, " You have not seen messy, buck-o, some houses with kids looks like a tornado hit it."

But yea, that is what is going on right now. In a rather large and unglorious nutshell. I pray daily for guidance and for the energy to get through my day. I am always so tired and blech. I need a spa day and a friggin mental enima. Yea that's it.